At a standstill..

for a few months anyways with TTC'ing.  I had yet another cycle review and even though the p7 b/w results were good....prog 27 and estrodial 12.4 (good enough)...the nurse informed me that Dr. S would like me and my dh to do another round of the 2 week antibiotics since my TEBB is still showing it's ugly head.  Ugh!  She also wants me on Clomid, DHEA and Mucinex...I wanted to faint for my poor stomach is not going to tolerate all of that and with the job I have right now...there's no way I'm going to work feeling likes S>>T.  I have six more weeks of teaching left before summer break so we agreed to wait until I was done so I could start working on taking more meds.  I just can't seem to wrap my mind around about how many meds it's going to take to get me pg.  Something about all of this just feels so random..if A doesn't work, try B, if B doesn't work try C and oh...nothing is working so take ABC together and......it's getting to be toooooo much.  I'm willing to sacrifice two weeks of my life to take those horrible antibiotics again (last time I still had bouts of diarrhea even with taking a probiotic! not fun when you are teaching and don't have a bathroom nearby!!!)...but I'm pretty sure I don't want to have the hot flashes of Clomid and weight gain..when I've taken that med two times before with no success.  So for now, I'll continue with the HCG, LDN, and I'll add the vitamins and mucinex...but antibiotics and clomid will wait until summer (maybe)....when I'll be doing all sorts of training for my new career.  Lord willing, I'll find the strength.  Geez... at my age...not sure how much of this I want to keep doing and my dh asks "What is going to happen if you do get pregnant?"  He worries that I'll be on more drugs that will make me sicker...etc, etc.  I told him that I will only worry about that IF that ever happens.

On a good note, my dh and I found another quaint vacation/getaway spot!!!!  We are on spring break right now so I found us a nice hotel by a lake for us to visit last weekend and we loved it.  We walked everywhere, it was quiet, restful and so very much needed. (very little talk about work).  We've decided that we will visit this location again.  My dh and I are also talking about a summer trip!!!  It was so nice to spend some good quality time with the love of my life.  I just can not express in words how much I love and adore my dh.  I never thought I could love him more...but I do!  We need more getaways!

So, I'm going to enjoy the rest of this break. I have a house to clean, paperwork to organize and planning to do for my new career (more on that later).  So maybe IF isn't exciting...but other aspects of my life are and I need to focus on the good.  God is good...and I just have to remind myself that I can find strength in God.  He is here for me and will help me through.  In reality...a decision will need to be made as when I've had enough.

Oh...for those of you that had Dr.S for surgery/dr visits...she had a baby last Feb.  The nurse mentioned that she is now back from maternity leave...I had no idea that she had had a baby.  She was pregnant when she did my surgery...I guess there was no reason for her to tell us that..huh?  Interesting.