So Hormonal

My goodness...it's been quite a few days with my hormones....combining HCG and LDN is knocking me on my butt...I've been so tired...yet...my gp thought the LDN would give me energy.  Not me!  I digress.

Back to the hormones...last Friday..I wasn't feeling well...tired...groggy..sad..all of that.  Well, I walked into another teacher's classroom at the end of the day and she proceeds to tell me that she's noticed that I'm overwhelmed...and it's obvious I don't like my job.  She said a few other things and I just began to sob.  I know I wear my heart on my sleeves...but I have been trying so hard to smile and be a kind teacher and hide my true feelings.  She told me that it will get better.  For who?  I won't go into details (this is an IF blog afterall) but things are not looking up...I know moving on is the right thing for ME to do.  I didn't tell her that but left her room sobbing..I couldn't stop.  I cried as I gathered my things and drove to the lab for my P+7 b/d...which was actually P+8 since I forgot to do it the day before..oh well.  I was hiccuping and all...I couldn't stop!!!  It took a long time for me to gather my breath!  That teacher felt horrible and I was not going to tell her.".I'm taking hormones and feel like crap".  I haven't cried like that in years.  Geez!  I've wanted to talk to the principal..but have avoided that for every time I approach her office..I feel like I'm going to cry.  Lord, I hope no one says anything else next week until my cycle starts.  I just may start sobbing all over again.  I'm tearing up as I type this...I am holding a waterfall.  The dam is ready to burst!

When I watched some of the pope's departure...I cried...thank God I was alone in my office.  I felt so sad.

At mass today...the choir sang one of my favorite songs..."You are Mine" and I was tearing up so I told my Dh that I wasn't feeling well...and needed air.  I haven't been feeling well and my hormones are not helping!  I did leave mass and go outside to collect myself.  I did come back for the final blessing.  Geesh.  When we got home I took a nap...after getting a good nights sleep.

Besides being hormonal, I feel nauseous, so tired, so very moody, and just blah.  I wonder if I'm fighting something for if it's just the meds.  I started taking 3 LDN pills...so is that too much (4.5 mgs)?  Anyone else have this happen?  I would call the dr but I just know she'll tell me to wait until my cycle starts...to see if it is indeed the meds or.....I won't say it.  I can't say or allow myself to think it.  I'm probably fighting something or it's the meds.  My cycle should start either Thursday or Friday.

So far now...I'm drinking 7-U.P and eating bland foods..just nursing myself to feel good enough to get my paperwork ready for parent teacher confs. in  a few weeks.  Ugh!  Thank God it's a three day weekend for me...I need to rest (and have been...not so much by choice).

Anyways..as one final thought...if the meds are making me feel this lousy...I hope they work (eventually).  I'm offering up my suffering for the next blogger on the adopt a blogger.  I guess when I have my next cycle rev...I'll mention how I've been feeling.

Bring on Spring!!!!!!  I know getting outside for walks will help me to feel better!  No More Snow!

St. Anne..pray for us!
Mary, Mother of God...Pray for us!